What even is this "Thoughts" thing for? OK so basically: It's for when I feel like typing stupid shit that is too stupid or short to be a journal entry. Like right now. This is not journal material. :)) - If you're here from Ready To Glare on Youtube then congratulations you've found another mentally ill person to throw in front of an audience and turn into an exhibit. Respect me as a person, this is my place to vent and it will stay that way. - I want to do good by other people but how is that supposed to work when they think I'm a deceptive, rude, apathetic failure? - Can't put into words how ready I am to just be done with school. I only have a few things left to do and then it's smooth sailing until summer break. And I mean, things should be easy, right? How hard can art school get. - Fuck my fucking eyes hurt so fucking bad right now and I don't fucking know why!!! - Forget that last thing I wrote cause I backed out and decided against eating the last of the blueberry pie. As I should. - I really do not enjoy feeling like the things that I do aren't ever good enough. But y'know it's time to go eat out of sadness and then regret it right away and wish I could throw it all up but not have the courage to try for the first time. - One day I'm going to kill myself and I hope that my family lives with the burden forever. They did this to me. - My hair is so soft......... - Dear god I'm a lonely fuck. - Man there are some people on Neocities that I wanna talk to and be friends with but the fear of being awkward is stopping me. Sucks. - I like this site so much. I'm SO happy with how it's turned out. - Hello again friends and foes and complete strangers, it is I, late night misery. There are so many things in my life that I want to CHANGE but it fuckin sucks that I CAN'T. But anyway I completely forgot that my graphic design assignment was supposed to be handed in a week ago, my stupid ass hasn't even gotten started. - I want the dad from Gossip Girl to read me a story!!!! He's got that perfect voice. - Male attention drives me wild. Sometimes in a good way, often in a bad way. It is how it is. - I FUCKING HATE MY ART TEACHER SO MUCH SHE'S SO FUCKING SLOW AND I HATE HER VOICE I HATE HOW SHE KEEPS WASTING MY TIME SO THAT I END UP BEHIND EVERYONE ELSE WITH THE ASSIGNMENT JUST LET ME FUCKING PAINT ALREADY AND GET IT OVER WITH. - It's raining outside, I love the smell and sound of it. It reminds me of 2008-2009 when I lived on the Isle of Man, and my parents had a window in the ceiling of their bedroom. Whenever it rained we used to sit on the bed and just listen. - Oh Gossip Girl, what would I do without you? My calls for entertainment have been answered and I refuse to hang up. - It's 08:50 in the morning. I haven't slept. Cheers to how exhausted I'm going to be in class tomorrow >:( Just end my life at this point. I wanna go to sleep but in order to go to sleep I need to get my ass out of bed, go brush my teeth and put my retainers in but I just DON'T FEEL LIKE GETTING UP! I have to eventually tho so might as well do it now before I pass out. - Why the fuck are periods a thing? I have THE worst cramps right now and it's going to be the death of me!!!!! Fuck human biology!!!! - I wish more visitors of my site would leave messages in my guestbook. I really enjoy reading the ones I do get. Fuckin say "Hi" at least! - Am I ever going to be able to let go of my attachment to Columbine? It's been over 3 years by now and occasionally my fixation will come back even stronger, like I'll spend a couple of weeks not really thinking about it but out of nowhere it blossoms up and I can't seem to get it out of my head. Right now I'm in one of those states. I just wish there was something I could've done. I know in my heart it's where I'm supposed to be, but time travel isn't real so it fucking hurts to know I'll never get there. - I miss my old friends. I miss the guy I used to be obsessed with. I wonder how he's holding up right now with all this COVID-19 shit, I really hope he's okay. And as much as I want to reach out and check on him, I know it's for the better not to.